From Tears to Trust

We were told that this City was a potent furnace;

set to blaze away droves of dross.

and certainly i've experienced a brief taste.

It was only a few days into my time in Jerusalem, that my Mind and Body were crippled by fatigue. I felt spiritually congested, and lacked focus.

People talk of Spiritual warfare.

and if i've never penned it before, i must clarify,

that i am wary of certain assertions..

and i am skeptical of attributing personal struggles to the acts of spiritual "principalities and powers."

I do admit,

We have three enemies: Spiritual hosts of wickedness, a Body of Death, and lastly the harlot "Mystery Babylon,"

The World, the Flesh, and the Devil.

Which enemy or combination of them plagued me i cannot say with certainty, though i suspect it was a combination of Flesh and World.

However, one thing i do know as Peter learned, is that overcoming our Enemies as Saints of God is not a matter of analyzing and contending with the Waves, but a matter of steady focus upon our Master's Eyes.

Now, after looking back at my mood and misguided heart, i cannot even discern my exact bewitchment.

But my Salvation from it is clear.

I remember the faithfulness of God.

I remember His faithfulness to this people, and their beautiful history.

I remember the Testimony of imperfect men blessed by their loving Lord.

And the promises made of the Christ.

And the promises made by the Christ.

Still more, the testimony of my own life.

How i have ended up here in this city.

How God's direction has so brought me here, and has yet to fail me.

Will He forsake me?

will He not work all together for good while i seek out His path?

and will He not answer my prayer if i do not ask amiss?

I wept for want of faith and guidance,

But now i trust for need of submission and continued Grace.

Therefore i embrace my time here.

As a student,

as a servant.

As a friend,

and a boyfriend.

and certainly chiefest, as an envoy of Yeshua here in His city.

I will walk these streets in prayer and hope for a future yet revealed.

God can, has, and will, mend the broken secret places of my Heart.

- Matthew